| The Column Below by HOPE Ministry, NYC, is a Description of their Ex-Gay Group that Steve and Jose Attended which was conducted at and by Calvary Baptist Church. The Column is taken from the HOPE website |
New York. A Tuesday evening "ex-gay" support group called HOPE led by an "ex-gay" deacon of Calvary Baptist Church. That's where Steve and Jose met. Steve had arrived early that evening. Perhaps as much as forty-five minutes early. He had come in from New Jersey, about an hour and half travel time away. Though this was his first time to this "ex-gay" meeting, it was by no means his first attempt at "ex-gay" help. Steve was currently in weekly counseling sessions by telephone with Joe Nicolosi in California, one of the founders of reparative therapy and NARTH (National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality). Steve had been recommended to NARTH for counseling by the leader of the "ex-gay" support group he initially attended in northern NJ, which was hosted by a semi-mega charismatic church. In addition, at the recommendation of Nicolosi, Steve was involving himself in weekly New Warrior meetings, also held in Manhattan. New Warriors is a straight men's group that works on how men should connect as men but often, instead, fail to connect because of individual and differing emotional and mental blocks buried deep in his inner child. Steve stood alone in the shadows of the unlit classroom on the second floor that over looks New York's 57th Street, not knowing that within ten months Brooklyn would become his new home and Manhattan the place where he'd find a new job working as a cold caller for a financial institution. Steve was 44 years old. An MDiv graduate of Grand Rapids Theological Seminary. Married with four children. And pastoring a Baptist church in Sussex county of northwestern New Jersey. His marriage was in disrepair; his children had become detached; his minister-father when directly asked was unable to say to his son "I love you;" and Steve was floundering. Since age thirteen, Steve knew he was gay: and all the spiritual "stops" he had applied to his homosexual orientation were falling apart. His desire for homosexual relationship was crowding him, pushing in upon him. Steve stood and spoke intently with the first person who entered the room there on 57th Street, Manhattan. Then a second person entered and a third. The two of them stood close by and engaged in conversation with each other. Out of the corner of his eye, Steve noticed the third man, a handsome dark- skinned man of moderate height with Caucasian features, a Spanish-African New Yorker of Puerto-Rican decent. His name was Jose. Jose was 30 years old. A public school guidance counselor whose undergraduate degree was in Bible (Columbia International University) and whose graduate degree was in applied psychology (New York University). Jose had set his heart on foreign missions, but after working in urban missions in Cleveland, Ohio, and finding his homosexual orientation pulling him in directions he did not want to go, he left the Cleveland ministry, returned to New York City, got to work on his graduate studies and involved himself in evening after evening of various sex-related support groups hoping to bring his homosexual feelings in line with what he believed was Biblically correct. Calvary Baptist Church's "ex-gay" group was one of the many support groups he regularly attended. The common interests Steve and Jose shared in areas of language, ministry, theology and counseling became evident to them as they talked at length again and again, alone or in small social groups, following the weekly Tuesday evening Calvary Baptist Church "ex-gay" support meetings. Prior to their meeting, Steve had prayed every morning for three years, "Lord, I need male arms now to hold me. I can no longer wait 'til that day when Christ will welcome me with his open arms. Can you send me male arms to hold me now?" Now Steve was telling his counselor, Joe Nicolosi, "I need to be held . . . and I've found the person who I think can do it. His name is Jose." "You can be held," said the NARTH counselor. "But I need to be held all night and all day," Steve explained. "Jose can hold you all night, all the next day . . . all weekend, right into Monday if you need." With mutual respect and with appropriate boundaries, Jose held Steve on a regular all night-Friday-into-most-of-the-day-Saturday basis for nine months while Steve wept and wept and spoke away every broken part of his soul. That was eight years ago. Steve and Jose have since evaluated both the "ex-gay" counseling they have received and the anti-gay theological rhetoric they were taught. On both counts, after much academic and theological investigation and personal soul searching, they have renounced what they have been counseled and taught. The holding still continues . . . and the boundaries? . . . well, their boundaries now take in the fact that they are a live-in couple in the Bronx with NYC domestic certification, committed to the well being of the other . . . lovers, as ex-"ex-gays." Date Written: September 7, 2005 |
| With reference to the above quotes in bold letters " . . . we have seen many of those miracles of change among us" note the following: Steve and Jose, while at HOPE, were never introduced to an example of an individual who had overcome homosexuality, including the leader himself who never shared his testimony. Furthermore no one ever sited an example of an overcomer from HOPE's more than three years of history prior to our participation. We cannot testify to having met a single overcomer at HOPE or having been told of one by name or anonymously. __________________ This column was created May 2006 |
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| Note: See Tom Hanks' dynamic exegetical study on Paul's Romans chapter one "against nature" in context of the whole sixteen chapters of the Apostle's epistle. |
| Go to Tom Hanks' scholarly study on homosexuality and the book of Romans |
From the following web site http://www.hopenyc.org/page3.html Hope Ministry, NYC is a ministry to Christian men and women overcoming homosexuality. Our ministry also supports parents and spouses of homosexual persons. It is a referral service of Exodus International. HOPE began at Calvary Baptist Church in New York City under the direction of Pastor Ken Geis in May, 1993. At that time, Dr. Geis contacted Exodus and Dr. Bill Consiglio who guided us along in establishing HOPE Ministry, NYC. We have had the blessing of having Dr. Bill Consiglio among us on a frequent basis. Dr. Consiglio is an ordained minister, author of "Homosexual No More", and certified Christian counselor with over twenty years experience working with Christians overcoming homosexuality. Over the years, we have seen many lives turned around and have been greatly encouraged by so many individuals who have won the victory and gained a new freedom. We do believe that Jesus Christ is the healer and worker of miracles and we have seen many of those miracles of change among us. We praise and thank God for the hope he has given us in him and in HOPE Ministry. "For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for calamity, to give you a future and a hope". -Jeremiah 29:11 |
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| as of October, 2006 |
Go to another page in this website: Ex-Gay Ministries In Their Own (Sorry) Words "Is There Really Such A Thing As Ex-Gay?" |